[the building is falling apart right? he’s straight up picking up a brick and yeeting it through the window, sliding into the driver’s seat to try and hotwire this thing (rolled a 16)
frantically pushing the button that like powers the sliding doors on the side so the others can pile in. you know the ones that open very slowly. comically slow. ]
Anyway, there's no time to be a sad gay when the building is literally coming down, so instead Dion settles for being a fast gay.
It's pretty chaotic outside, and Dion doesn't actually throw himself into the minivan. Instead, he clambers on top of it, piercing the roof with an anchor to keep himself from flying off when Lucien eventually gets it started, and making a lance with his other arm so that he can stab at the any zombies that amble close so hopefully Lucien can just hotwire the car in peace. ]
Sidon, don't wander too far!
[ They're not going to leave you behind!! Can Sidon even hear him while he's all roided out. ]
[ wow, there's a lot happening. that was a load-bearing door on that building and now it's coming down. why does quynn only roll like shit for captain boomerang specifically.
not that sidon is very occupied with that right now, because while their npcs and rodya with a giant kite load up to the slowest possible car doors opening with a cute little beep beep beep, it's on sight for every zombie here. he doesn't even bother with the spear, just mauling any shamblers that come even remotely close by ripping off limbs and tearing through things. he has kinda-claws and teeth and he's huge, huger than usual, so it's probably like a dog attacking some chew toys.
sidon is not typically an angry person but beating things up is fun for him so that's nice.
anyway once they're all loaded up for school, he's going to jump over and land on the car when dion calls for him and dig his nails into the top of the van with a shriek of metal to hang on. they may have to share real estate. dion can be a clay parka. ]
[You rolled to not get squished/puked on/detected by Superman. You were so close to tpk, actually.
With everyone either inside or on top of the car, the gang is free to floor it and get the heck out of Crime Alley. The dice have been incredibly nice to you, too, so Sidon and Dion will easily deal with any zombies who come too close. Deadshot and Captain Boomerang will also lend a hand with their own ranged weapons, firing at any zombies that Boops and Goops Goops happen to miss.
The Janker will manage to drive them all the way out of Crime Alley, through Crest Hill, and then across the Robert Kane Memorial Bridge to Bristol. In the rearview mirror, they will catch a glimpse of Superman approaching the collapsed building you take a turn and disappear out of view.
This is where they run into trouble, though. Remember those fires that you could see all the way from Crime Alley? Well, the road that leads directly to Wayne Manor is completely up in flames with toppled trees, piled up vehicles and a whole mess of both zombified and non-zombified corpses. Your waterbottles will helpfully inform the gang that there is an alternate route they can take through the Gotham Cemetery, which basically involves getting to the west side of the lot and jumping the fence, but they will have to abandon their car and tough it out on foot.
Also, the ground is kind of... cracked and glowing green the closer you get to the cemetery. This seems fine.
[ they do a quick straw poll around the mini-van and the votes seem to land on the cemetery route. that seems like a good idea. lucien will ... pull the van into the parking lot, take up three spaces diagonally and then throw it into park.
can he take a look through the gates and see if he can spot anything ominous close by? ]
[ This really does not look like it's going to be a good time, but fork it, we ball.
Dion absorbs his lance back into himself (gay), and stands up on the roof of the minivan. Using the height to his advantage, he's going to try and look across the cemetery grounds.
Does there seem to be a... non-cursed path they can take? ]
[ Rodion was on autopilot but now she's back babey. Sometimes you just shut your brain off to do work for a little while. Also yeah she's just going to helpfully comment that dying by zombies or head explosion is going to probably be more pleasant than dying by fire in a literal death box made of metal, so, let's NOT get this roasta cookin', shall we?
Also she thinks the eyeball is gross. She is super making a face as Dion does that yet again. ]
Hell no.
[ And then she'll yeah just see if she can open the gates or if there's a lock on it she'll just break that with her axe let's gooo. ]
[RIP to the owner of this mini-van, who is likely never seeing it again.
There are zombies in the cemetery. This probably counts as ominous? The majority of the graves have been dug out from below, the headstones heavily damaged, and the soil itself is glowing a faint, ominous green. An odd, chemical-like scent lingers heavily in the air. It's almost like the entire cemetery has been soaked in whatever substance that is. It gets more intense further into the cemetery.
There isn't really a non-cursed path they can take. They will still have to fight their way through the zombies roaming in the cemetery. But as long as they can clear a path for themselves and make it to the west side of the cemetery, they should be able to reach Wayne Manor within minutes.
The cemetery gates are already open. Seems like the zombies busted it open long before the squad got here. How nice of them.]
They won't encounter many zombies this close to the gates, as the majority of them have moved on to terrorize the citizens of Gotham. Aside from swinging their weapons at the occasional zombie that comes too close to them, what they mostly need to worry about is not falling into any of the open graves.
Or, you know, minding their step so they don't get dragged down into a grave by one of the recently risen.
Which is exactly what is about to happen, when two sets of hand (one purple, one beige) abruptly burst out of one of the open graves to try and drag Lucien down with them. Fortunately, they do not succeed thanks to Lucien's Nat 20. But there are now two zombies trying to crawl out so they can go after the gang.
One of them is so badly crushed that they can barely move, slipping and falling back down the moment they try to lift themselves over the edge. It's a tall, muscular woman, with stringy blond hair barely clinging to what's left of her scalp and a butterfly tattoo on her chest. The second zombie currently clawing its way out of the grave is in much better condition despite the gaping hole in its chest, but... hm? Hm.]
[ frankly, how does this happen. its the same body. the nat 20 means he violently kicks his way out of their grip, but he falls on his ass in the process - pushing his way as far away from these two things as quickly as he possibly fucking can. the panic is clear and obvious and ugly and he's pushing himself to his feet and swaying uncertainly, like he isn't sure whether the right move is to run or violently attack them with everything he has. pieces. splinters. broken things.
he runs his hands into his hair and starts fucking laughing. ]
[ Well, okay. The second jorber dragging itself out of the grave does give him pause, eyebrows shooting up in a way that isn't visible from underneath the headpiece of his dragon cosplay.
But his confusion is secondary to Lucien's panic.
He reabsorbs the lance, but keeps the shield up as he reaches down to pick jonker up, not throwing him over his shoulder quite get, but urging him upright and keeping an arm around his middle to keep him moving as Dion hurries toward the gates. ]
[ ah. dion had handled a familiar face with an almost stoic aplomb, but it seems that—maybe being attacked by one's doppelganger is a little different. it's unnerving even for a relative bystander to see a earth-stained version of his own party member clawing out of the ground, a hole studded in his chest.
but they have to be quick, and it looks like dion has yorker in his hold, so he takes his spear and moves to dispatch one of the zombies as it reaches after them.
and as she's reminded them, kitewoman has an axe, so it's an even 2v2. ]
Normally maybe she'd make a casual comment about it but even she knows actual insanity (bad) when she sees it, or hears it rather. And Jorper was in Arkham for being the top dog of all that and more. ]
Hope you won't miss 'em too much.
[ Sardonic as she goes to axe the zombies down on their way through. The dead should stay dead, frankly. ]
With these fucking awful rolls I just made, the doppleganger and the woman won't put up much of a fight. Sidon impales the former with his spear, and Ridon can easily axe the woman down on her next attempt to crawl out of her grave.
The bad news is that one of my shitty rolls was for how much attention the gang is getting with, uh, Lucien's mad laughter and all. It's not good news.
There are zombies coming their way from all directions, outnumbering the group and their exits. Thick, black sludge drips out of their mouths — right before they start projectile vomiting at the gang. Time to move fast or risk getting zombified.]
[ yeah that's probably the best idea. he isn't doing anything at all to help keep moving, complete dead weight - as for the mad laughter, it gets louder as sidon impales the doppleganger, and turns into something of a scream when rodya axes through the woman. he's still digging his hands into his hair, dragging one clawed hand directly down his face hard enough to split skin and draw blood. ]
You're slipping, you're slipping--
[ he might need to be dragged out of here. at least he's not laughing anymore. ]
[ He grits his teeth, using his clay shield to ward off the vomit as he throws Lucien over his shoulder so that he can book it toward the manor. He doesn't bother to fight off the hoard at this point in order to prioritize speed, trusting Kitewoman and Boops to look after them, and if any zombies or their projectile vomit get too close, then he'll just barrel through them.
And if any of the vomit gets on his clay, then he'll just discard it. ]
[ jumper is going through it—he'll stick behind to help cover goops since he has dead weight to carry. ]
Go! We'll cover you.
[ that means pulling his spear free as quickly as possible, the doppelganger's body falling back into its grave with an unsettling, wet thump, and taking down zombies as they go. off to the manor they go! he'll make sure their water bottles are okay too, and just pick up one to carry like a sack of potatoes if they roll like shit. ]
[ Not gonna lie, Rodion was literally about to bash Georger over the head with the blunt end of her axe for laughing and screaming. All those zombos rising up from their graves and shambling towards them because of the sound is not a good sign.
He did stop laughing but he's still insane though so he can get a little light sock from her fist before Goops Goops takes off with him.
As for the horde, she'll use the kite as a shield to ward off any incoming vomit since it's not like she has any other defense to work with. Maybe she can axe down a zombie or grab one to use as a meat shield before kicking them away and taking off after the rest.
She'll bring up the rear! Don't fall behind, Deadshot, Cap'n Boomer. If she ends up being late, she can take off with her kite and catch up, presumably. ]
[So. Dion uses his clay shield (clield) to block the vomit.
This turns out to be a bit of a mistake. Almost immediately, it becomes incredibly obvious that something is horribly wrong. Starting from the area hit by the vomit, branches, leaves and vines start to sprout painfully from his clay. He may discard that part of him before it reaches his main body. But once he does?
The discarded pieces of clay change. Small, babylike features appear on what now appears to be a little egg with legs. It stares back at Dion with woeful, confused eyes, uttering—]
Dada?
[And then screams and gets torn to shreds as it becomes a miniature bonsai tree.
Rodion, with her shield, manages to avoid getting splattered with any of the vomit. Similarly, the power of being insane apparently makes the Jingle invincible, and Lucien somehow avoids getting puked on while getting socked and carried around like a sack of potatoes. Sidon is still hulked out as well, and scrapes by unscathed.
Now. Your water bottles.
With a 10, some of the projectile vomit splashes onto Deadshot's mask but thanks to the fact that he's wearing a full body suit of armor, it doesn't manage to penetrate through to his skin before he's ripping the damn thing off his face.
Captain Boomerang does not fare nearly as well. Thanks to the fact that he was already fucked up before the group reached the cemetary, parts of his sleeves had already been torn the fuck up. The vomit seeps through his damaged costume, spilling into the exposed skin of his left arm — and he screams in absolute agony when plants start to sprout from the already messed up limb.
And then faster than anyone here can react, Deadshot pulls out a sword and slices the appendage off before the infection can spread. He shoves the good captain at Sidon and shouts:]
Keep moving!
[They've almost made it to the west exit. Just a little further now.]
[ he's completely quiet now, just holding his face where the scratches are dripping blood - his only injury so far being completely self-inflicted. hooray!
he's sort of potato sacked over dion, so there's only so much he can do, but if something gets close enough he'll take a nasty swipe with the joybuzzer at them. ]
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[the building is falling apart right? he’s straight up picking up a brick and yeeting it through the window, sliding into the driver’s seat to try and hotwire this thing (rolled a 16)
frantically pushing the button that like powers the sliding doors on the side so the others can pile in. you know the ones that open very slowly. comically slow. ]
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Anyway, there's no time to be a sad gay when the building is literally coming down, so instead Dion settles for being a fast gay.
It's pretty chaotic outside, and Dion doesn't actually throw himself into the minivan. Instead, he clambers on top of it, piercing the roof with an anchor to keep himself from flying off when Lucien eventually gets it started, and making a lance with his other arm so that he can stab at the any zombies that amble close so hopefully Lucien can just hotwire the car in peace. ]
Sidon, don't wander too far!
[ They're not going to leave you behind!! Can Sidon even hear him while he's all roided out. ]
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not that sidon is very occupied with that right now, because while their npcs and rodya with a giant kite load up to the slowest possible car doors opening with a cute little beep beep beep, it's on sight for every zombie here. he doesn't even bother with the spear, just mauling any shamblers that come even remotely close by ripping off limbs and tearing through things. he has kinda-claws and teeth and he's huge, huger than usual, so it's probably like a dog attacking some chew toys.
sidon is not typically an angry person but beating things up is fun for him so that's nice.
anyway once they're all loaded up for school, he's going to jump over and land on the car when dion calls for him and dig his nails into the top of the van with a shriek of metal to hang on. they may have to share real estate. dion can be a clay parka. ]
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With everyone either inside or on top of the car, the gang is free to floor it and get the heck out of Crime Alley. The dice have been incredibly nice to you, too, so Sidon and Dion will easily deal with any zombies who come too close. Deadshot and Captain Boomerang will also lend a hand with their own ranged weapons, firing at any zombies that Boops and Goops Goops happen to miss.
The Janker will manage to drive them all the way out of Crime Alley, through Crest Hill, and then across the Robert Kane Memorial Bridge to Bristol. In the rearview mirror, they will catch a glimpse of Superman approaching the collapsed building you take a turn and disappear out of view.
This is where they run into trouble, though. Remember those fires that you could see all the way from Crime Alley? Well, the road that leads directly to Wayne Manor is completely up in flames with toppled trees, piled up vehicles and a whole mess of both zombified and non-zombified corpses. Your waterbottles will helpfully inform the gang that there is an alternate route they can take through the Gotham Cemetery, which basically involves getting to the west side of the lot and jumping the fence, but they will have to abandon their car and tough it out on foot.
Also, the ground is kind of... cracked and glowing green the closer you get to the cemetery. This seems fine.
So, what now?]
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can he take a look through the gates and see if he can spot anything ominous close by? ]
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Dion absorbs his lance back into himself (gay), and stands up on the roof of the minivan. Using the height to his advantage, he's going to try and look across the cemetery grounds.
Does there seem to be a... non-cursed path they can take? ]
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he'll scout around too without doing any clay eyeball shenanigans—is the source of the glowing within eyeshot? ]
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Also she thinks the eyeball is gross. She is super making a face as Dion does that yet again. ]
Hell no.
[ And then she'll yeah just see if she can open the gates or if there's a lock on it she'll just break that with her axe let's gooo. ]
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There are zombies in the cemetery. This probably counts as ominous? The majority of the graves have been dug out from below, the headstones heavily damaged, and the soil itself is glowing a faint, ominous green. An odd, chemical-like scent lingers heavily in the air. It's almost like the entire cemetery has been soaked in whatever substance that is. It gets more intense further into the cemetery.
There isn't really a non-cursed path they can take. They will still have to fight their way through the zombies roaming in the cemetery. But as long as they can clear a path for themselves and make it to the west side of the cemetery, they should be able to reach Wayne Manor within minutes.
The cemetery gates are already open. Seems like the zombies busted it open long before the squad got here. How nice of them.]
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Move quickly. If we get in a fight, don't let them separate us. Slow them down whenever possible, pick off stragglers first.
[ OKAY BOSSY!!!!!!!! well. he's heading in. so at least he'll go first. ]
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If we stay together, I will be able to act as a shield for us should things grow dire. But we should aim to keep moving.
[ Makes himself a nice lance and shield and charging in they go!! ]
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Kitewoman's mobility is sure to help as well.
[ if they need to make a break for it... anyway yeah off they go!! into the horde, quickly. ]
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[ And she WILL go in swinging, she is damned good with this axe. Why did she pick the kite to be her signature thing? ]
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They won't encounter many zombies this close to the gates, as the majority of them have moved on to terrorize the citizens of Gotham. Aside from swinging their weapons at the occasional zombie that comes too close to them, what they mostly need to worry about is not falling into any of the open graves.
Or, you know, minding their step so they don't get dragged down into a grave by one of the recently risen.
Which is exactly what is about to happen, when two sets of hand (one purple, one beige) abruptly burst out of one of the open graves to try and drag Lucien down with them. Fortunately, they do not succeed thanks to Lucien's Nat 20. But there are now two zombies trying to crawl out so they can go after the gang.
One of them is so badly crushed that they can barely move, slipping and falling back down the moment they try to lift themselves over the edge. It's a tall, muscular woman, with stringy blond hair barely clinging to what's left of her scalp and a butterfly tattoo on her chest. The second zombie currently clawing its way out of the grave is in much better condition despite the gaping hole in its chest, but... hm? Hm.]
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he runs his hands into his hair and starts fucking laughing. ]
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But his confusion is secondary to Lucien's panic.
He reabsorbs the lance, but keeps the shield up as he reaches down to pick jonker up, not throwing him over his shoulder quite get, but urging him upright and keeping an arm around his middle to keep him moving as Dion hurries toward the gates. ]
We cannot be distracted; we must keep moving.
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but they have to be quick, and it looks like dion has yorker in his hold, so he takes his spear and moves to dispatch one of the zombies as it reaches after them.
and as she's reminded them, kitewoman has an axe, so it's an even 2v2. ]
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Normally maybe she'd make a casual comment about it but even she knows actual insanity (bad) when she sees it, or hears it rather. And Jorper was in Arkham for being the top dog of all that and more. ]
Hope you won't miss 'em too much.
[ Sardonic as she goes to axe the zombies down on their way through. The dead should stay dead, frankly. ]
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With these fucking awful rolls I just made, the doppleganger and the woman won't put up much of a fight. Sidon impales the former with his spear, and Ridon can easily axe the woman down on her next attempt to crawl out of her grave.
The bad news is that one of my shitty rolls was for how much attention the gang is getting with, uh, Lucien's mad laughter and all. It's not good news.
There are zombies coming their way from all directions, outnumbering the group and their exits. Thick, black sludge drips out of their mouths — right before they start projectile vomiting at the gang. Time to move fast or risk getting zombified.]
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You're slipping, you're slipping--
[ he might need to be dragged out of here. at least he's not laughing anymore. ]
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[ He grits his teeth, using his clay shield to ward off the vomit as he throws Lucien over his shoulder so that he can book it toward the manor. He doesn't bother to fight off the hoard at this point in order to prioritize speed, trusting Kitewoman and Boops to look after them, and if any zombies or their projectile vomit get too close, then he'll just barrel through them.
And if any of the vomit gets on his clay, then he'll just discard it. ]
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Go! We'll cover you.
[ that means pulling his spear free as quickly as possible, the doppelganger's body falling back into its grave with an unsettling, wet thump, and taking down zombies as they go. off to the manor they go! he'll make sure their water bottles are okay too, and just pick up one to carry like a sack of potatoes if they roll like shit. ]
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[ Not gonna lie, Rodion was literally about to bash Georger over the head with the blunt end of her axe for laughing and screaming. All those zombos rising up from their graves and shambling towards them because of the sound is not a good sign.
He did stop laughing but he's still insane though so he can get a little light sock from her fist before Goops Goops takes off with him.
As for the horde, she'll use the kite as a shield to ward off any incoming vomit since it's not like she has any other defense to work with. Maybe she can axe down a zombie or grab one to use as a meat shield before kicking them away and taking off after the rest.
She'll bring up the rear! Don't fall behind, Deadshot, Cap'n Boomer. If she ends up being late, she can take off with her kite and catch up, presumably. ]
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This turns out to be a bit of a mistake. Almost immediately, it becomes incredibly obvious that something is horribly wrong. Starting from the area hit by the vomit, branches, leaves and vines start to sprout painfully from his clay. He may discard that part of him before it reaches his main body. But once he does?
The discarded pieces of clay change. Small, babylike features appear on what now appears to be a little egg with legs. It stares back at Dion with woeful, confused eyes, uttering—]
Dada?
[And then screams and gets torn to shreds as it becomes a miniature bonsai tree.
Rodion, with her shield, manages to avoid getting splattered with any of the vomit. Similarly, the power of being insane apparently makes the Jingle invincible, and Lucien somehow avoids getting puked on while getting socked and carried around like a sack of potatoes. Sidon is still hulked out as well, and scrapes by unscathed.
Now. Your water bottles.
With a 10, some of the projectile vomit splashes onto Deadshot's mask but thanks to the fact that he's wearing a full body suit of armor, it doesn't manage to penetrate through to his skin before he's ripping the damn thing off his face.
Captain Boomerang does not fare nearly as well. Thanks to the fact that he was already fucked up before the group reached the cemetary, parts of his sleeves had already been torn the fuck up. The vomit seeps through his damaged costume, spilling into the exposed skin of his left arm — and he screams in absolute agony when plants start to sprout from the already messed up limb.
And then faster than anyone here can react, Deadshot pulls out a sword and slices the appendage off before the infection can spread. He shoves the good captain at Sidon and shouts:]
Keep moving!
[They've almost made it to the west exit. Just a little further now.]
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he's sort of potato sacked over dion, so there's only so much he can do, but if something gets close enough he'll take a nasty swipe with the joybuzzer at them. ]
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