AUDIENCE 🚀 DAHUT

[dropoffs]

Comments

[artificialsweetener]

[HE REALLY GAVE HIM TERROR INSTEAD OF SPAM. NOT LIKE THIS.]

Um... Yes, supposedly they died in some sort of crash incident before this tour? Where the ship was collapsing... Are you alright, monsieur?

[He lets go of where he'd been hanging onto Vash's arm to ratshake him, now instead delicately touching his side.]

[dropoffs]

[ Closing his eyes, then shaking his head. ] ... My head kind of hurts, but it isn't a big deal. [ He does think it's odd, though. No rejection of the touch checking, though. ]

[artificialsweetener]

[VASH YOUR WEIRD DEAD AMNESIAC HEADACHE!!! Dahut's brow is furrowed, expression colored with a soft sort of concern, and then he just gently tugs on his arm.]

Let's sit, okay? Eat this - and I'll get you some water, too.

[dropoffs]

[ They can sit then, wherever Dahut wants. There's a bite inside him that wants to say he's fine and not to worry about it, but as he thinks about it more, the more unsettling it feels. It's better to not give Dahut trouble, though. Shoulders sinking, he relents. ] All right... Sorry.

[artificialsweetener]

[BACK TO THE CANTEEN where he can properly fuss...]

There's no need to apologize. It's not your fault... [...] The headache part, to be clear. You should really be eating if you're hungry, you know.

[Once he's all seated and tucked away, Dahut will go nyoom to get him some water and then slide into the seat beside him.]

[dropoffs]

[ THEIR FLESHY CAFETERIA. He'll give Dahut that and drink from the cup of water offered. ] You're right about the eating part. There's just—[ He rubs his head. ] So much to do.

[artificialsweetener]

[Sweet Vash... He will reach up and possibly have to stretch a bit so he can rub Vash's noggin too.]

Stop getting lost in the inner reaches of the Helly Belly and you'll have more time to eat! [HELP. But he says this in a way that implies he is just teasing... Even with his stern face.]

Do you need me to give you dinner reminders, at least?

[dropoffs]

[ Help. Sometimes you get lost during Sundays for some reason? I imagine Dahut can pat his head while he's sitting. Little man can't be THAT SHORT. ] What? Like you're my mom? [ He's an adult, 150 years old, and now suddenly someone wants to give him dinner reminders... ] You don't need to. I'll be good.

[artificialsweetener]

[Vash may be over twice his age but that won't save him from Dahut's moming, in the same way that Scien being two decades older than him and also Like That doesn't save him from Dahut's moming.]

I'm sure you understand why I have trouble believing that when the only reason I get to feed you right now is because your belly tattled on you.

[dropoffs]

[ Vash really cursing his stomach. Why is hunger week attacking him... He just wants to be a good little Plant who doesn't need to eat. ] What was the point of asking then?! [ ILLUSION OF CHOICE? ]

[artificialsweetener]

[Vash out here being a normal not-human-food-eating non-human and Dahut's just like "YET ANOTHER ASSHOLE WHO'S OUT HERE NOT TAKING CARE OF THEMSELVES".]

To give you advanced warning!

[The illusion of choice...]

[dropoffs]

What if I pinky promised?! [ Granted, he likes being cared for because he's a sucker... But damn. The Catholic guilt is in this version, too. ]

[artificialsweetener]

[NOT THE CATHOLIC GUILT AGAIN STOP WE LEAVE THE CATHOLICISM IN HOMOS.

He extends his lil pinky...]

We can pinky promise that you'll let me fuss a little as long as I don't fuss too too much! How's that?

[dropoffs]

[ We have not, seeing that Vash is here. ] That's a totally different promise. [ But he reaches out with his prosthetic hand. A mechanical teal pinky will curl around Dahut's. ]

[artificialsweetener]

[punches the catholic out of him]

It's a better one! [He will curl his pinky around Vash's lil prosthetic one in turn and give his hand a shake!] No take-backs, okay? Pinky promises are forever!

[dropoffs]

Can't take back pinky promises. Those are the rules! [ Adds to the little shake. ] All right. So what's for dinner?

[artificialsweetener]

[A bright lil smile! And then he pulls his hand away, patting the table next to Vash's plate.]

I'm sorry that I can't do anything more than this, but I cooked up some spam and made bread with curry powder that I found earlier. So hopefully it's tasty, and at least a little filling!

[dropoffs]

[ Looms over to see what's on the menu from the Dahut Ezbake. ] That still sounds pretty good. Better than nothing. [ He will dig in with a big bite. Can you imagine if a Vash mouthful is just half of this ration. ] Honestly, I like spam. [ Because he's a raccoon. ]

[artificialsweetener]

[DAHUT JUST LIKE I SEE WHY HE WASN'T EATING.

But his expression still lights up at that! Hell yeah enjoy his lil raccoon meal made for raccoons please and thank you.]

It isn't so bad! When it's grilled, it tastes really nice! I'm not so much a fan of it before it's cooked, though...

[Much like me, aki, who also loves fried spam but could do without spam saimin.]

[dropoffs]

[ what if he wasn't eating because peanut kept eating their rations?? Sweet Dahut... Vash is oddly wide and it shows in this space bodysuit or whatever, then also quite tall. I think he's 185cm which i honestly don't think should be allowed. He's chewing for a while despite how the bite didn't have a lot in it. Gotta savor the flavor. ] Yeah, straight out of the can it's kind of gross because it's... Slimey, but it's good grilled. [ Chew chew. ] You doing all right after everything that we watched...? [ even if they had really funny subtitles and weird dramatic zooms onto Viktor's shark hickeys. ]

[artificialsweetener]

[THEN THEY WILL HAVE TO SIMPLY EAT PEANUT. wow though what's he so freakishly tall for. i already knew this but i keep forgetting and re-learning it like an endless horror show

There's a little hum of agreement about the SPAM THOUGH. It's true... Slimey straight from the can but so nice and crispy and salty when it's fried. That's some good stuff. They're eating like kings in the garbage. As for the question:]

Mm, I am! You don't have to worry about me, monsieur. I'm very sturdy! [FLEXING his little weenie arms... And then reaching out to pat Vash's.]

What about you?

[dropoffs]

[ in trigun maximum he was apparently shorter... idk why they decided to give him 5 cms in stampede. They're eating like kings now and when everyone gets their blood panel when you guys submit for a clinic or sodium will be OFF THE CHARTS. ] That's good! But if you ever feel like anything, you definitely should let it out and not bottle it in! [ HYPOCRITICAL. ] ... I know I'm not over there and there's not much I can do, but I wish there was. [ Despite Vash being dead and really someone should HELP THE GRAVE. ]

[artificialsweetener]

[HELP THEY SAID ELEVATE. ELEVATE HIS SIZE AND HIS CATHOLIC GUILT. Yeah though their blood's about to be fucking weird, full of nanites and so much spam.]

Hmm... I think there are other people who could use that advice more than me, monsieur. [CLOCKING HIS ASS but also clocking Luke's ass.]

I can understand that, though. It's really frustrating when you have to watch people struggle and you can't do anything to help, right?

[dropoffs]

Luke's repressin', isn't he... It is hard to see people suffer. [ SHIFTS THE SPOTLIGHT ON LUKE TO ROAST even though Vash is incredibly sad about people dying. ] Yeah, it is, but that's motivation to try to find a way back and to... Figure all of this weird stuff out.

[artificialsweetener]

Well! Monsieur Luke definitely has his own set of problems, that much is true. He really can't stand being seen when he's feeling anger or upset or sadness, it seems.

[DON'T JUST ROAST LUKE LIKE THIS. But it's okay because he immediately moves to roasting Vash instead.]

Aren't you the same? With how quickly you acted to save those figures in the fog, you must be someone who values life very highly... So watching this happen must be painful for you, right? But I think that rather than simply being a private person, part of why you hide away is probably because you don't like burdening others. Right?

[HE SAID DIE.]

You're right about that, though! Nothing like the threat of death to motivate a person.